What Time Is It?

Time for your 11 o'clock-ish blog post :)

I have a few words for you.

Gallery. Eaten. 1500 Categories Lost. Kay Crying.

We Interupt Your Regularly Scheduled Broadcast

...to bring you a rant.

[IMDB: Atlas Shrugged Cast & Crew]

That sound you hear? That is the sound of my soul dying.

I actually want to cry a little.

Incan Matrimonial Headmasks?

I am about to blog.

Why am I telling you that I'm about to blog? Well, it's because, though I've finally thought of something to say, I feel a need to explain my recent absence but I feel no need to tie the two posts together.

My life has been…complicated…of late. Which isn't to say that my life isn't always complicated, it's just reached a new plane of complicated.

Anyway, that's neither here nor there.

I don't blog to update people on my life, save the occasions when I've recently disappeared or the times when there really is news to pass on and I'd like to impart it without going to through the painful and difficult ordeal of actually having to talk to people. I blog either because I'm hoping someone will read it and it will change their mind, like posting about someone doing something stupid, or I blog because there is something going on that I really hope people know about, like when I update the latest PEEJ arrest scores. I blog when something amusing happens and I just feel like talking about it, like when a funny news story comes off the wire and, lastly, I blog when I feel the need to talk but there's no one to listen.

With that having been said, it's not that I don't have anything to say or that nothing is going on, it's that too much is going on and I can't get a grip on it. I feel like James fucking Joyce.

King would be proud.

I Told You Fuckers

[The Number 23]

As most of you who are reading this know, most people I am aquaineted with have a deep seated phobia about the number 23 and, unhappily, it didn't originate with this movie.

Well, anyway. We all fucking told you so, and now movie producers know it too.

I should get myself a trend spotting gig.

New Puppies!

Why I Won't Be Blogging Today

Because I did this instead.

WooT!

This would be an exceptionally self absorbed post, except that having a blog and knowing people will read it is kind of self-absorbed anyway, so I figure, I should just call it a wash. And, yes, I know that no one cares, but i'm telling you anyway - I dropped a dress size :)

I'm such a major fangirl for myself right now it's not even funny. :)

I'm Supposed To Die Tonight

It's a pity really, that 25 minutes of my best "North Korea" material was just wasted on a 13 year old boy, because I think you all would've enjoyed it.

A few years ago, people started giving me hell for my statements against joining the military - namely that we're "fighting wars on four dangerous fronts, at this point." because they inevitably turned to me and said "four dangerous fronts?" and I said "Afgahnastan, Iraq, Iran and North Korea" and they said - "...?"

Ladies - Gentelmen, yup.

The hair really should've given it away. The crazy gets into the roots and just shoots out.

[MSNBC:: Nuclear Fucking Weapons]

FDA Approval

Once in a while, I find a reason to congratulate an arm of our government for doing something truly good. It doesn't happen that often, as my views on politics are relatively narrow and, while not pragmatic, are at least situationally aware.

Yesterday, there was a small victory for every woman in the US.

[MSNBC: FDA OK's 'morning after pill' without a prescrption.]

While the article should read an addendum of "to women over the age of 18" but a victory is a victory, no matter how you slice it.

Anything that can remove one obsticle between another accidental mother - right, gentlemen?

Note: A the same time, Plan B backers are still fighting the cause to give OTC access to girls under the age of 18.

I'm Not Dead

...er, something.

For those of you that follow the blog through this link - or through aggregators, kudos, you're among the few dedicated enough to know that this blog will still be maintained.

The last few months have been a flurry of opportunities and new people and the time seems to have finally come to tone down the content of the blog that is directly attached to my site. New posts will appear both there and here, depending on their content and nature.

Just, you know, in case you cared :)

Perverted Justice: Huggles All Around

Today I had the great pleasure of working closely with Del Harvey of PEEJ to arm the HPFF site and it's members with just a little bit more amunition against the perils of the internet.

Woot :)

*shrine*

Congratulations PEEJ!

As I was browsing the Perverted Justice website today, looking for some info I needed for a news posting about HPFF's Personal Information Awarness campaign (Del Harvey has been kind enough to work with us on educating our users) I saw a happy note on their index page.

Today, they announced their 70th Conviction. Congratulations. Del, would you like some of our eye sanitizer?

Boot Camp

Well, I just got some "sounds like fun" news today. When my parents and younger brother return from their wanton trip to Wisconsin Dells, where I suspect they plan to drink, sleep, cook over the fire and fight like heavy weight champions and then come back intoning the wonders of family bonding, I get to keep the small one.

Yes, that's right, I am about to be charged with a 13-year old boy. Problematic on many levels, no?

So, does anyone want a kid for a few days? As it turns out, he has a batmitzvah to attend in town on Saturday of next week and, until then, he is under my care because my parents would like to return to Ohio.

Can anyone think of an injury that would prevent me from caring for a child but not prohibit my coffee-pouring abilities?

Fishies!

You know, about five minutes after I posted that, I thought of something I could blog about.

I am in the market for a new pet. True, I still have three adorable dwarf hamsters left and I do love them dearly, but as their birthday comes and goes, I am painfully aware of the fact that they are coming up on the end of their 1 to 1 1/2 year life span and I don't want to be one of those pet owners that sits around pouting about their dead animals for ages before getting ready to, finally, go out and get a new one. That said, i'm over mammals. As much as I would love to go out and buy a cute little puppy, I can't because buying a puppy would be a suicidal move on my part. Thus, I've been in the market for a pet of another kind.

My initial thought was a turtle. Yes, I am still on that "turtle" thing and, yes, one day I will have one but that day is not today. Turtles (the kind it is legal to own in this country) really must be kept outside in a sort of habitat of their own, which means that I need to a) live in a climate where they will be warm enough and b) live in a place I know i'm going to be for a while. I am neither and, thus, my goal of owning a pet that will outlive me must wait so I've moved on to two prospects.


The Orchid Dottyback:
A relatively normal sized saltwater aquarium fish, I have decided that nothing this pink can exist in nature without being owned by yours truely.

True, owning one will mean that I have to learn all sorts of things about saltwater aquariums but I've done quite a bit of passive reasearch thus far and none of it has been particularly painful. Plus - hi, how pink is that?!!??!

They generally live about 2-4 years, which means it's not a pet you're stuck with into eternity if you don't like it and, for once, I wont be at all allergic to the animal I own. It's cute and it swims around and does adorable little things.

Still, as much as the fish appeals to me, I have qualms - oh the qualms :) Saltwater tanks are difficult to maintain - quite a bit more work than just wandering in once a week, dumping them out into a garbage bag and power spraying out the cage. *whistles* but the cute is overwhelming and the non-allergic, non-noisy factors have their advantages as well. Thus, I considered an interim to the interim pet.

The African Dwarf Frog:
I will admit, they're not that cute up close but, because they only ever get to be 1 1/4 inches long in their life-times, you never really have to look at them up quite that close. From what I can tell, as long as they're properly fed and the tank they live in isn't overstocked, they don't make a lot of noise. They can eat dried bloodworms - like the things you feed to Siamese Fighting Fish - and, freshwater or not, you can take care of them the same way you would any other kind of fish. A thin layer of gravel over the bottom of the tank and a penguin filter, some lighting, a few live plants and whatever else you feel like throwing in to make it cute. (Yes, if you're an animal enthusiast, i've done a lot more research than that - i know all about nitrate cycles and properly dechloronating tap water or useing distilled...and setting up the tank three week sbefore putting the frog in to allow the cycles to stabilize...)

As it stands today, that is probably the route I will end up going. They seem somewhat less succeptable to...well, my life...than my adorable pink fish but, mark my words, that fish will some day be mine.

Blogging

I haven't had a lot to say of late, which is very uncharacteristic for me. Perhaps my spirit has finally been crushed? :)

No that's not the case - actually, i've been spending a fair bit of time chatting with other people and it takes time away from my ranting and raving. Incidently, i did almost do a bit on how much I hate jellyfish last night but I ended up spewing that bile all over a-ron.

Sorry guys and gals - but I am still alive and kicking - just not that hard.

Between The Lines

Last night was a fucking long night. But, last night was also the first night that I've ever laid down and fallen asleep almost immediately. True, it could be said that I was emotionally exhausted, because I was. For as much as I'm inclined not to sleep, I don't handle it well. Pretty much any morning where I wake up and my cuticles are bloody from me ripping at them is a morning I know didn't start off well, but it's OK.

Part of what made my night a long night was a 201 seminar on my blog. Seeing yourself through the eyes of other people is the same reason i've always loathed poetry and short stories. Sometimes, a story is just what it looks like - a story. At the risk of poking a bear, one of the few conversations Jeremy and I had was me explaining to him why I hated our bleeding heart liberal dyke professor for over-analysing everything. I cannot imagine any of my favorite authors being able to suffer through Lit 101 if their novels were the ones being taught, because I can't imagine watching someone analyse your sentance structure with a straight face.

"How were you feeling when you wrote the scene in which Harold commits suiicde?" and the real answer is "I was up against a deadline and I couldn't get the character to develop the way I wanted him to, so I killed him off."

My point? It's seldom as complicated as it seems with authors and it's certainly seldom as complicated as it seems with me. There are very scarcely deeper meanings to the things that i'm posting. For as much as I like to play my hand close to the vest with people in my life, there is nothing that is off-limits when I blog, so whatever i'm blogging tends to be exactly what I mean with no minced words. This is my life - not a comic novel. It is what it is and it's difficult to drive symbolism into shit when you're living it. Maybe one of these days when it's over i'll tell the story and I promise i'll throw some metaphores in there for you guys. In the mean time, if i'm talking about the Catholic Guilt Complex, i'm probably really talking about the Catholic Guilt complex.

A couple of days ago, I blogged this and like five people asked if I was OK. There is no emoticon to describe my face when they did, but I suspect if there was, it would have been all eyes.

I'm disclaiming. When i'm mad at someone and throwing punches - it looks like this or maybe this. See, idn't that obvious? When i'm depressed, it looks like this or this. When i'm wandering around the recesses of my mind thinking about something at random it looks like this.

Is it a bad sign when being in a fantastic mood reads like depression?

All i'm saying is, don't read too much into anything. If i'm in tears while I'm posting, you'll know it, because I'll say it. I can always be counted on for that :) Christ, I was listening to The Bangles for this one and who can be depressed listening to The Bangles?

And no, i'm not crying or throwing anything. I'm having apple juice and wondering why my speakers wont go up any louder...I think some of the wires fell out. Easy tiger :)