Overheard It

How is it that someone else created this website before I did?

Overheard In New York.

My Favorite:

Girl #1: So we're in bed, fooling around, and he goes, "Does it feel good when I rub your G-spot?" And I go, "I'll let you know."

Girl #2: Ooh, that's so mean!

Girl #1: Please. I'll fake a clitoral orgasm for anyone. But I draw the line at faking a G-spot orgasm. No man's self-esteem is that important to me.

They Demoted Pluto

When I told Mike that one of us had to blog this, I really sort of meant that he had to blog this but, as per usual, I was ignored.

Jimmy & the Keys Blog (click They Demoted Pluto)

All The Emo Boys & All The Emo Girls

[[Note: I labored over where to put this. In the end, I decided to maintain the sanctity of the official site blog and keep it free from rants on "sensitive issues" but you can bet your ass that some form of this is making it to my deviantArt journal. Fucking hoodlums.]]

I am 21 years old and, yes, I have a hard time saying that. I’ve been sexually assaulted twice, put two close friends in the ground, lived through the fear of a best friend with cancer (and, no, she’s not one of the one’s who died) watched my married mother attach herself strongly to the description “polygamous,” destroying my father. I’ve made the call to institutionalize a friend. I’ve known people in hospitals who, by all rights, should never have come out alive. And the worst part is, I so don’t have even close to the worst life ever.

This morning, after waking up too early and responding to said early awakening by simply getting up, I grabbed my lap top and started doing what I do nearly daily – browsing the dA stock photography gallery. I do this, by the way, because in the great computer crash of 2006, my extensive supply of vector stock links was lost and I no longer have reference photo’s for projects. Not that it matters, but anyway – carrying on. Like many mornings, my search was fruitless, until – hark, is that another kid with a handgun?

Call me crazy, but I’d like to schedule a restructuring of the photo galleries at Deviant Art – Kids with Sharp Objects and Blood, Kids with Guns and Naked Kids with Low Self-Esteem. It would at least make my searching process easier.

Now, now – before you go on a “but it’s art!” rant, I, dabbling in hentai as I am want to do, appreciate a good naked female as much as the next girl. True, I tend to shy from the 300lb women who feel the need to take off all of their clothes, photograph themselves with a single long-stemmed rose and call it artistic nudes, but I’ve found many a use for the others as reference photos in vector renders and cell shading. Still, I’ve yet to get anything other than a stomach ache from seeing someone playing with a handgun and photographing it. Yes, I assume that anyone intelligent enough to operate a digital camera and the dA interface is intelligent enough to make sure the thing isn’t loaded and the trigger lock is on, but I cannot for the life of me fathom a need for this image to exist in the world. Not to make an example of her personally, though, because I’m certain a search of “gun” would reveal more than you could shake a stick at. If you looked really hard, I’m sure you could probably find Naked Kids with Sharp Objects, Blood and Guns.

I checked, it isn’t as though the dA’r is making a political statement – speaking to the strangulation of our generation or the tragedy of what happens when you send kids to war. They’re not trying to say “Hey, future suicide hotline callers – there’s another way out.” They’re just another little emo girl amidst all of the little emo boys glorifying yet another one of life’s many bad decisions.

As I mentioned earlier, it’s not just Kids with Guns – if I see on more drop of cornstarch blood on that site outside the context of Halloween costume stocks I may borrow that girls gun and end it myself. They run lines of the stuff down their cheeks and pretend like they sliced themselves open. They douse their tongues in it and then run their mother’s cleaver along the faux wound with an angsty look on their faces and scream “high art!”

Call me crazy. Call me biased. Call me bitter. That’s just not art ladies and gentlemen – that’s an utter lack of coping skills and a total absence of perspective

Woodward - Bernstein, Where Did You Go?

This morning, when I rolled out of bed - or rather, over to the keyboard, I found an article on MSNBC that caught my eye - Space Station Science Get's Squeezed. At the time, it was just a little article tucked under the science section that no one was really intended to notice but as, what is apparently a slow news day, trickled on, somehow, this travesty managed to get top billing with a great big pretty picture highlighting it at the top of the page.

The thing about it that caught my eye is - hi, i'm sleeping with a NASA geek but, even me, the relatively disconcerned, was wrapped up in it within a few sentences when I read the phrase "$100 billion white elephant" and almost fell out of my desk chair because - yeah, this is so not in the OP-ED section where it belongs.

What happened to fact checking? What happened to fully understanding a situation before you started spouting your mouth off? I know integrity isn't something you can expect from an individual on the street, your next-door neighbor or, in my case, your mother but christ - since when did it become truly acceptable for journalists not to care what kind of tripe their putting into the minds of the American public.

I know that people can't be jack-of-all-trades and that when you're reporting on a subject you're often given a short amount of time to educate yourself on something that is generally far to massive a subject matter for you to fully understand in the span of a few days, but when that happens, isn't it the resposibility of the journalist in question and of their editors and the owner of the paper to step in and tone down the condescending, malformed opinions a smidge?

FDA Approval

Once in a while, I find a reason to congratulate an arm of our government for doing something truly good. It doesn't happen that often, as my views on politics are relatively narrow and, while not pragmatic, are at least situationally aware.

Yesterday, there was a small victory for every woman in the US.

[MSNBC: FDA OK's 'morning after pill' without a prescrption.]

While the article should read an addendum of "to women over the age of 18" but a victory is a victory, no matter how you slice it.

Anything that can remove one obsticle between another accidental mother - right, gentlemen?

Note: A the same time, Plan B backers are still fighting the cause to give OTC access to girls under the age of 18.

Tucker Can Dance

Hey, can anyone confirm this? I was just watching TV or - rather, reading the captions on the tv - and I saw a commercial advertising Tucker Carlson as a future contestant on Dancing With The Stars.

I wonder if he'll wear the bowtie.

Family

I long to belong to a family where a kids worst fear is walking in on their parents having sex.

What The Hell?

Sometimes, I'm forced to wonder - what in the hell is wrong with this world?

Everyone reading this, far and wide, knows that I frequently rail on my mother for being a generally insensitive individual. She's intelligent enough to make you think she should know better, but no matter how hard you try, she never seems to actually know better. It's enough to drive a sane person crazy.

This morning, when I woke up in my freshly colored hell, I was striken with the overwhelming sense that I should not get out of bed today and, as I rolled over, kicked off my blankets slid my feet into slippers and plodded over many many moving boxes to the bathroom, I was certain there was something wrong wtih the air. Fifteen minutes later, I was aprised of what that was.

It, ladies and gentlemen, was the stink of extramarital affairs. Not mine, nor mikes, but my mother's - because nothing says dysfunction like a 40-year old, married, dyke. Yes, it's true, this morning, my mother was to be found galavanting around town with another married 40-year old dyke whom, earlier this week, she asked if she could sleep with - illiciting a completely called for "No," from my father. Since that ill-fated day, she has seen this woman 3 times, exchanged countless e-mails and phone calls and generally completely disregarded how uncomfortable her husband is with the situation as a whole.

He's packing.

Huzzah for the tippers!

I'm Not Dead

...er, something.

For those of you that follow the blog through this link - or through aggregators, kudos, you're among the few dedicated enough to know that this blog will still be maintained.

The last few months have been a flurry of opportunities and new people and the time seems to have finally come to tone down the content of the blog that is directly attached to my site. New posts will appear both there and here, depending on their content and nature.

Just, you know, in case you cared :)

Phew

I actually found something to really blog about. Well, something other than us saving physics, but I lost the link to that...or Y2K The Sequal: Now They're Really Pissed Off (inquire inside for explanations :P)

Blanks on a Blank Short Film Contest.

Perverted Justice: Huggles All Around

Today I had the great pleasure of working closely with Del Harvey of PEEJ to arm the HPFF site and it's members with just a little bit more amunition against the perils of the internet.

Woot :)

*shrine*

Happy Birthday To Me!

So, last year I asked for fruit snacks. This year, I didn't even try.

I did, however, pop online to find a medly of songs ,dances and visual representations :) They're no fruit snacks, but they'll do :P There were lots of other happy birthday,s but tehse were some of the fun ones :P

Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday dear BitterEpiphany aka Kaaaaaaayyyyyyyy
Happy Birthday to you!
You are now the big 21
You can now drink legally although someone else probably has already told ya thaaaaaaaattttttt
And you can now do just about anything else you wanna do puuuuubbbbbblllllllliiiiiiicccccccllllllyyy(sp?)
And I think that I spelled that wrrrrrrrrooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnggggggggg
Oh, and if you wanna killl soooooooooommmmmmeeeeeeeooooooonnnnnnneeeee- you have the permission to kill me because I hate making tyyyyyyyyyyppppppppppppooooooooooossssssss
But you should be made Ultimate Admin noooooooooooooooowwwwww
Which is right around the time I should be hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiidddddddddddddiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnngggggggg *keeps singing while looking for a place to hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiddddddddeeeeeeeee*

http://food.oregonstate.edu/images/fruitveg/banana/banana016.jpg”>one, two and three

this one bullied me into using it, four

Five and six complete with a Buddha

Why have bumps when you can have bananas? seven

the eighth banana, although wooden, still counts as a banana

Nine and ten love each other a lot

eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen and fifteen just to get rid of a lot at once

Just cos I'm saying the shadow of this one counts as number seventeen doesnt mean I'm cheating, you try having to come up with original banana comments evertime someone has a birthday

18, 19, 20 almost there

Number 21 is blow up. No I will not be giving one for good luck. A blow up one if quite enough.

We've had an epiphany today!
To Kay's birthday, we'll all say hooray!
She keeps us in stitches
and her blogs do enrich us.
'In the pink' she appears every day.

Christina Agulara

Normally, I'm not a Christina fan.

Sorry, I just felt the need to say that :P Anyway, so way back in the day when she did that track with Nelly - the one they performed live at some awards show - there was a red flapper dress involved and Nelly was wearing a fedora - I was impressed because my life of the 20's, 30's and 40's has never been denied. The reason, in case you're wondering, that I don't know the name of the song is simple - I can't, or won't, listen to it without the video of the performance because that song is theatrical and the performance is half the fun.

Well, that was pretty much the end of that and I let it go but when she released the video for Ain't No Other Man a few weeks ago, Mike showed it to me right away becuase he knows how I feel about the era. That poor man has been forced to sit through more Kay Kyser than any man ever should have to and I think he was just looking forward to having new songs that sounded kinda like that but with a more modern twist. I was excited, but not yet convinced. One track does not a cd full of great music make.

So tonight, I got my hands on the album and I was greeted with Candyman. I looped and looped and looped. I may not find out how the rest of the album is because i'm now officially addicted...and dancing in my socks :)

<---- happy girl :)

Congratulations PEEJ!

As I was browsing the Perverted Justice website today, looking for some info I needed for a news posting about HPFF's Personal Information Awarness campaign (Del Harvey has been kind enough to work with us on educating our users) I saw a happy note on their index page.

Today, they announced their 70th Conviction. Congratulations. Del, would you like some of our eye sanitizer?