Wow.
This is so strange. I have had the worst couple of weeks ever. I mean honestly, this is the worst i've felt in so long. I guess maybe thats just becasue its easy to forget how bad you felt last time. Which is good, because maybe i'll be able to forget all of this too.
It started with a fight with Mike, and then turned away from that to saying goodbye to Ian, and then switched gears and I was so excited that I was gonna go to Harrington, which aleiviated some of the stress about hating parkside and how really bad it has started to get to me, but that was underscored with a few hundred things. Before I even got the chance to be upset about moving so far away from Mike my mother was already rainiing on the parade, telling me it was a bad idea, basically. And then I come home, and i finally get to be properly upset, and then this TB shit hits...and the minute that it all finally sorta ends i end up over with mike getting dumped on again. He just like went about every reason that what i'm doing isn't the right choice for me. And then fucking colin is like "Just make sure its really what you want." And sure, everyone thinks they're being diplomatic and nice and polite but it certainly doesn't seem like it. It's all like i can't even be trusted to make my own decisions. Like everybody has to shepard me away because i'm gaurenteed to fuck up again.
Everybody is so quick to tell me that they think what i'm doing isn't right, and of course not directly, but no one has any idea what I should be doing instead or how they propose I do it.
Lets really think about this. So say I get a job making 10 dollars an hour working 40 hours a week, assuming I could figure out a way to get to work long enough to figure out how this driving thing works and get a car and of course we have to assume that i can find and get this job. I can't start work full time until school lets out. Thats not good. That means I have to move back home until i can get this car and being that they're re-working the entire structure of the house, i dont know how that will work. Unless, of course, I offered to buy a sofa on which I could sleep...Which would be a good idea, because I do need to also find time to buy some furniture. But, my mother is in the process of decorating, So an IKEA sofa would be the only real choice, since they have slip covers that I like and others that she likes, in order to make it work with her house for however long I have to stay and not something that i'm gonna hate when I move out.
This is so strange. I have had the worst couple of weeks ever. I mean honestly, this is the worst i've felt in so long. I guess maybe thats just becasue its easy to forget how bad you felt last time. Which is good, because maybe i'll be able to forget all of this too.
It started with a fight with Mike, and then turned away from that to saying goodbye to Ian, and then switched gears and I was so excited that I was gonna go to Harrington, which aleiviated some of the stress about hating parkside and how really bad it has started to get to me, but that was underscored with a few hundred things. Before I even got the chance to be upset about moving so far away from Mike my mother was already rainiing on the parade, telling me it was a bad idea, basically. And then I come home, and i finally get to be properly upset, and then this TB shit hits...and the minute that it all finally sorta ends i end up over with mike getting dumped on again. He just like went about every reason that what i'm doing isn't the right choice for me. And then fucking colin is like "Just make sure its really what you want." And sure, everyone thinks they're being diplomatic and nice and polite but it certainly doesn't seem like it. It's all like i can't even be trusted to make my own decisions. Like everybody has to shepard me away because i'm gaurenteed to fuck up again.
Everybody is so quick to tell me that they think what i'm doing isn't right, and of course not directly, but no one has any idea what I should be doing instead or how they propose I do it.
Lets really think about this. So say I get a job making 10 dollars an hour working 40 hours a week, assuming I could figure out a way to get to work long enough to figure out how this driving thing works and get a car and of course we have to assume that i can find and get this job. I can't start work full time until school lets out. Thats not good. That means I have to move back home until i can get this car and being that they're re-working the entire structure of the house, i dont know how that will work. Unless, of course, I offered to buy a sofa on which I could sleep...Which would be a good idea, because I do need to also find time to buy some furniture. But, my mother is in the process of decorating, So an IKEA sofa would be the only real choice, since they have slip covers that I like and others that she likes, in order to make it work with her house for however long I have to stay and not something that i'm gonna hate when I move out.
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